No doubt, discouragement has crept into some aspect of your life these past weeks of unprecedented self-isolation. I’ve seen many writers on Facebook talking about how hard it is to write during this season.
On a personal note, my family’s summer plans were destroyed, not just because of coronavirus, but because of an unexpected health problem with my husband. We had planned months for our family sabbatical, during which we’d travel around the west backpacking and camping, making memories our children (ages 13 and 10) would remember forever. A once in a lifetime trip, we called it. It’s been hard to let myself feel the disappointment of this loss.
Perhaps you are suffering from the same heaviness of having life—and your carefully laid plans—upended by circumstances beyond your control.
This heavy mantle is what I call discouragement. Discouragement is disappointment on steroids. Disappointment is a natural, emotional reaction to something that doesn’t go our way, someone who’s let us down, or an expectation not met. Discouragement is when that disappointment takes up house in our hearts. When I am disappointed, hope still glimmers at the edges of my frustration. When I am discouraged though….hope is locked away, and the key is nowhere to be found.
Kind of like what we see with Cleopas and his friend as they walked away from Jerusalem toward Emmaus after Jesus’ death. Luke 24 tells us this story, highlighting the soul-crushing discouragement of these disciples. Unaware that they are walking with Jesus, they say to him, “They crucified him, but we had hoped that he was the one who was going to redeem Israel.”
My breath catches at the utter sorrow of this statement.
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life” (Proverbs 13:12).
Maybe discouragement is making you sick. This is no light thing with no easy solution. Seeking a licensed counselor is always a wise option. We are, as this pandemic has showed us, community-oriented people who need to talk, pray, and be with others. Finding someone to help you work through the deep waters of life is a great option.
Asking questions of ourselves is also a great option, and maybe the place to begin. Ask yourself:
• Where am I discouraged? If it’s hard to pinpoint, imagine yourself as Cleopas and his friend. Finish this statement, “I had hoped….” Journal out where your emotion takes you.
• And now ask, what am I going to do about this discouragement? Cleopas and his friend pushed on in normal activities: they ate because they were hungry. Sometimes, it’s as simple as that. Do the next right thing. At other times, it’s more complex. Thomas had to touch Jesus to move past his discouragement. Peter had to have a fireside fish-fry with Jesus, in which he humbled himself before his Savior three times with, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”
Here is an example from my career as a writer:
• I am discouraged with my sales. I had hoped that I would make more money last year to help my family, but the world of independent publishing is a hard one right now.
• I am going to set deadlines for myself and keep writing. I will not look at the sales of others. The next right thing is the next sentence typed. And then after this book, I’m going to take a break—whatever that means. This break will probably include some humble fireside fish eating with a risen Savior, and maybe some professional help if I feel so led.
Finally, from a practical standpoint, here are some tips for writing through discouragement in this crazy time.
• Don’t neglect your physical needs of healthy food, exercise, and sleep.
• Check in with a writer friend once or twice a week for encouragement and accountability
• Don’t pretend everything’s fine. Journal each day, allowing yourself to confess hard things.
• Set boundaries with the members of your household. Let others know your expectations about when and how much you want to write.
• Keep a list of the things that must be done (laundry, vacuuming, etc.), then don’t let that list control your time. Do a few things each day and draw others into the tasks. You don’t have to do it all.
• Tend your soul. Pray, read scripture, listen to music, list thanksgivings. Whatever feeds your spirit, do it. Reach for joy but give yourself permission to feel discouraged.
How are you doing as a writer right now? I’d love to hear stories from the front lines of your battle with discouragement, or simply your new way to do life as a writer during this time of quarantine.
Reach for joy but give yourself permission to feel discouraged. @SondraKraak @MaryAFelkins #amwriting #encouragement #authenticity #seriouslywrite
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Washington Territory, 1871
Anna Warren grew up on the seat of a wagon, the daughter of Seattle's busiest freighter. After her father’s death—a tragedy away from home—she returns to their cabin on the outskirts of Seattle, seeking the sense of belonging that eluded her childhood. But will her desire to pray for miraculous healing for the sick and wounded endear or alienate her to the community? Her most aggravating challenger is also her staunchest defender and has brown hair and eyes, stands six feet tall, and farms with unchecked tenacity. Tristan Porter. This farmer her father had befriended holds more secrets than Yesler’s Mill holds logs.
When ugly rumors arise about her spiritual gift and her property, Anna fears her quest to find belonging will be thwarted.
Tristan holds the truth to set her free, but revealing it will require him to face the disappointments of his past and surrender his plans for the future—a sacrifice he’s not sure he can make.
