Loneliness and the Writing Life by Cherie Burbach

Cherie Burbach

I have a lot of great friends in my life but at one point I went through a period of time when I was very lonely. My husband traveled for work, some of my closest friends moved, and suddenly I just found myself without the particular types of friendships I most desired. And that’s the key with loneliness. It isn’t necessarily about having lots of friends, it’s about having the close connection you crave.

My job doesn’t help matters in that area. Most of the time I’m required to be alone in a room with just me and the computer. Oh sure, my dog joins me (and acts as my proofreader occasionally, so if you notice a mistake you can blame her), and while I get sympathetic looks from her I don’t get the conversation I sometimes desire.

I’m a full-time freelancer who specializes in writing about relationships. So I’m pretty comfortable talking about things like needing more friends or loneliness. During one phone conversation with a family member I shared that I was struggling a bit with loneliness. And you know what she did? Snorted some snotty response about how she wished she had time for loneliness! She was too busy to be lonely!

Well, I was busy, too. Being lonely doesn’t mean you don’t have enough to do. And that’s when it hit me, that there are people who experience loneliness and aren’t as comfortable talking about it as I am, and this is the type of response we (their closest friends and family) give them.

So when I wrote my latest book, I wanted it to be for people who might just want a few new friends (maybe the ones you have just aren’t giving you the types of connection you want right now) or those that need to meet a few people. Maybe they are feeling lonely right now. Maybe they just aren’t totally happy with the state of their relationships right now.

Friendships are fluid and even when you have long time friends that have been in your life forever, you might still need a few more who get you. It’s as simple as that.

In 1 Peter 5:7 we read “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” I want people to know they are never alone, even in the dark, lonely times. Even when the rest of the people in your life don’t get where you’re coming from. He is always there keeping us company and encouraging us. He puts the right people and situations in front of us to help us through.

About the Author

Cherie Burbach is a poet, mixed media artist, and freelance writer. She’s penned 17 books and has written for About.com, NBC/Universal, Match.com, Christianity Today, and more. Whether it’s writing articles or creating art, all of Cherie’s work centers on relationships and faith. She includes book pages, music sheets, and other fabulous random things in her art to create something that celebrates a hopeful message. Visit her website for more info, cherieburbach.com.

About 100 Simple Ways to Have More Friends

100 Simple Ways to Have More Friends
by Cherie Burbach

The more friends you have, the more you’ll have the right people in your life to give you the support and connection you desire. Having more friends means you’ll consistently connect with new people and also keep the good friends you already have. If your friendships don’t seem to stick, you’ll be making friends and losing them quickly. The key to having more friends is increasing the number of people you meet on a regular basis and holding on to the great pals you already have.

This book contains one hundred suggestions on how to make new friends and also strengthen the friendships you already have. The tips are varied, with suggestions on how to meet new people interspersed with ideas for nurturing your new and existing friendships.

Rock Star or Seed Sower? by Camille Eide

Camille Eide

Have you ever reached a point in your writing journey where you wondered if what you were doing even mattered?

Are you there now?

I’ve attended too many funerals recently. Although none were famous Rock Stars, I found out each person was uniquely gifted at something. One quiet little saint was remembered for her unconditional love. She had unique ability to forgive and forget flaws and to see and encourage the best in people. She didn’t have a record label. She never hit the NYT Bestseller list. But she performed like a Rock Star at encouraging people. She used her gift so faithfully and so well that it left a lasting imprint on countless lives.

Maybe you’d never make it on American Idol, but you have a knack for baking and are a meticulous housekeeper. That’s a God gift! A struggling neighbor might be forever changed through your kind act of cleaning their house and leaving a warm loaf of bread. You never know when the simple act of doing what you’re good at plants a seed.

Perhaps you’re a writer who wonders if you’ll ever be published. Perhaps writing friends who began with you are passing you by and sometimes . . . you wonder why you’re still trying.

Let me ask you this: Do you have a way with words? A knack for communicating through story or writing style? If you do, it’s a God-gift. Keep at it! Look for daily opportunities to use it. Send an encouraging letter. Tweet a beautiful truth. Write someone a poem. Like tiny seeds, the words we plant have potential that we may not see.

“I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor.” 1 Corinthians 3:6,8

Sow the seeds God entrusted to you. Let Him worry about the outcome. You may become a household name, or you may not. Does it matter? God gave you a gift, but your name wasn’t on the tag—His was. What matters more than a contract or accolades is that faithful thing you do with your gift, day after day. If the only thing you can do well is bake a lovely loaf of bread, then bake bread like a Rock Star and share it with the hungry every chance you get.

If you’ve been given the gift of words, then the writing or plotting or researching or blogging or whatever wordy thing you are doing today MATTERS.

Even if your friends are bypassing you with contracts and awards.

Even if no one is raving about your work.

Even if your Amazon ranking can’t see the light of day.

Because even if no one else is applauding, what you do faithfully with the gift God has entrusted to you matters to Him.

Click to Tweet
If you’ve been given the gift of words, then ... whatever wordy thing you are doing today MATTERS. @camilleeide http://bit.ly/1AbBwDO 

Your Turn: What first prompted you to write? What did you hope to gain initially, and have you attained it? What have you gained from writing that you didn’t expect?

About the Author

Like a Love Song
by Camille Eide

Camille Eide writes heart-tugging tales of love, faith, and family. She lives in Oregon with her husband and is a mom, grammy, bass guitarist, and a fan of muscle cars, tender romance, and Peanut M&Ms.

Camille’s latest inspirational novel, Like a Love Song, releases April 30 from Ashberry Lane Publishing. It received a 4 ½ star “Top Pick” review from Romantic Times (May).

Like a Love Song
When she finally surrenders her heart, will it be too late?
Susan Quinn, a social worker turned surrogate mom to foster teens, fights to save the group home she’s worked hard to build. But now, she faces a dwindling staff, foreclosure, and old heartaches that won't stay buried. Her only hope lies with the last person she’d ever turn to—a brawny handyman with a guitar, a questionable past, and a God he keeps calling Father.

Like a Love Song is a romantic drama about a fiercely loyal woman, some cast-off kids, and finding the courage to believe in a Love that never fails.

Castles, Gratefulness and Why You Might Kiss Your Carpet by Holley Gerth

Holley Gerth

My heart has been so blessed to follow Holley Gerth for almost a year now and I wanted to share her encouragement with you. I was so thrilled when she agreed to let me re-post this wonderful piece about dreams and gratefulness on Seriously Write. Be sure to follow the links to Holley's website and don't forget to subscribe to her newsletter so you can smile every day, too. ~ Angie

Every little girl grows up dreaming about living in a castle. So as I flip through channels and find a home tour in a renovated castle I pause for a moment. It’s gorgeous–high walls, timeless floors, winding staircases. The hostess explains a local architect and his wife have brought new life to this old place. The wife nods and then replies, “Would you like to see a picture of it before we began?”

What she shows the camera next almost jolts me out of my seat. It’s nothing but ruins. No roof. No windows. Just jagged pieces of wall stretching into the sky.

I shake my head in wonder. How did they even have a vision for what that place could be?

Just seconds ago I thought, “It would be really cool to live in a place like that someday.” Now I take it all back. No way would I be willing to do that much work. I landed on the “happily after” part of that castle’s story and completely missed how arduous the process had been to get there.

I thought about how I often do the same in other ways. I look at an area of another woman’s life that I admire – maybe a talent, skill, strength or dream that has come true – and I think, “It would be really cool to live in a place like that someday.”

But I don’t see the whole picture. I don’t know how much renovation happened in her life to get her there. I don’t have the back story that shows God gets all the glory. I haven’t counted the tears or uncovered the cost along the way.

"You are loved. God has a purpose for you.
He is working out his plans for your life."
- quote and graphic by Holley Gerth

Jon Acuff shared, “Never compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.”

I’d take it one step beyond that and say, “Never compare your middle to someone else’s happy ending.”

And know that if we’re longing for someone else’s “castle” we’re also asking for all the effort, energy and emotion it took for that to be built in their lives. Do we really know what we’re asking for?

Writer Kathryn Stockett received 60 rejection letters before a publisher accepted The Help, which became a runaway best-seller and popular movie.

Olympic athletes train in obscurity and make significant sacrifices just for one shot at seeing their dream come true.

The Apostle Paul experienced being beaten, shipwrecked, imprisoned and more in order to fulfill his calling.

By the time the television segment on that renovated castle finished I felt ready to kiss my carpet.

I had a new appreciation for my realities.

So next time we see a “castle” in someone else’s life that’s complete let’s close our eyes for a moment and try to imagine not just what could be but what may have already been. And then take a moment to thank God for being wise enough not to give us everything we think we want–and all that comes with it.

Click to Tweet
Never compare your middle to someone else’s happy ending.
I landed on “happily after” & completely missed the process to get there.
You're loved. God has a purpose for you. He's working out his plans for your life.

About the Author

Holley Gerth 
"I’ve loved Jesus, words and ideas ever since I was a little girl in my grandparents’ bookstore, where I curled up with stacks of books tall enough to touch the sky. God grew the dreams He planted in my heart and I served as a writer and editorial director for DaySpring for over a decade. Then He led me in a new direction and I’m now the best-selling author of You’re Already Amazing as well as several other books with Revell."

Connect with Holley
Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/HolleyGerthPage
Twitter - http://twitter.com/HolleyGerth
Pinterest - http://pinterest.com/holleygerth/

You're Going to Be Okay
by Holley Gerth

You're Going to be Okay
You really are going to be okay. And it truly is possible to live with joy, resilience, and strength no matter what life brings. Yes, there will be hurt and hard times. But God wants to help you find ways to survive, grow stronger, and even thrive--no matter what happens. For every woman who has been disappointed, who has watched a dream disappear, whose life isn't what she imagined it would be, bestselling author Holley Gerth has a heartfelt message of hope.

With her trademark positive encouragement and probing questions for self-reflection, Holley encourages women to spend less of their lives regretting and more of their lives truly living. She shows them how to guard their hearts against despair and look to the future with confidence, remembering that they are part of a greater plan and nothing can stop God's purposes for them.

Amazon, Barnes & Noble, CBD.com, DaySpring, Givington’s, Family Christian, LifeWay

Brainstorming Villains – Creepy In Layers by Michelle Lim

Michelle Lim

Posts on Tuesdays usually refer to overcoming some sort of obstacle in life or in our writing, but today we have the wonderful Michelle Lim discussing how to make our characters' miserable through our villains. This was originally posted on her blog, Thoughts on Plot, but she's graciously allowed me to repost it here for you today. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. ~ Angie

There are some villains we see in our lives, on TV shows, or on the news that are creepy to the tenth degree. Those kinds of villains are easier to splash on the page than the less obvious villain.

How do you build a creepy villain when they are less than obvious to the average person?

You build creepy in layers.

We often build layers in our characters, but our villains need them to, especially if they are building the impending doom for your characters.

Creepy Layers Every Villain Should Have:

1. Motivations that make them evil. Villains need motivations for what they do, just like our other characters. Their motivations don’t need to seem normal to the rest of us, but they need to have some.
2. Private moments to enjoy their wickedness. In your story include some scenes that show the wickedness of the villain’s thought world or private actions.
3. Power over the hero or heroine in some way. Show how the villain is powerful to impact the hero or heroine’s world. ( I learned this tip from Susan May Warren through My Book Therapy.)
4. Proximity to the hero or heroine who is unaware of the danger they are in. This often adds a lot of conflict to a scene and gives opportunity to build the tension.
5. Public face that hides the truth and often makes those who suspect them seem judgmental. This will allow your hero or heroine to feel guilt when suspecting the villain.
6. Reflect their villain nature in their scene surroundings. If you have a gritty villain, show that in the setting. If you have a serial killer they will have a much darker setting. Build the darkness of your villain in the scene’s story world. This allows you to show the evil without making it easy for the hero/heroine to recognize their darkness.

What layers do you think make a villain creepy?

Click to Tweet:
Every villain needs a moment to enjoy their wickedness. #mystery #suspense
Build creepy in layers. #amwriting #mystery #suspense
Build your villain's darkness in their story world.

About the Author

Idea Sparking: How to Brainstorm
Conflict in Your Novel
by Michelle Lim

Author Michelle Lim is the Brainstorming/Huddle Coach with My Book Therapy Press and the Midwest Zone Director for American Christian Fiction Writers. Her romantic suspense is represented with Books & Such Literary Agency. Michelle writes devotionals for The Christian Pulse Online and Putting On The New as well as articles for her own blog, thoughtsonplot@wordpress.com. Since her nonfiction book release, Idea Sparking: How To Brainstorm Conflict In Your Novel, through public speaking and online chats Michelle helps writers discover the revolutionary power of brainstorming to bring new life to their stories.

Follow Michelle On Twitter https://twitter.com/MichelleLim24
Follow Michelle On Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/michelle.lim.5

Idea Sparking: How to Brainstorm Conflict in Your Novel 
Plotting a riveting and compelling story that stands out from the thousands of novels on the bookshelf takes creativity and strategic thinking. An author must learn to think outside the box, and yet create conflict reasonable and personal to their characters. Whether you love to plot out every infinite detail in your story before writing, or prefer to discover your story on the journey, Idea Sparking: How to Brainstorm Conflict in Your Novel is the tool you need to create the right conflict to build a powerful story.

Why Would God Shelve Me? Our Difficulties Make Us Better Writers, Part 2 by Kimberly Rae

Kimberly Rae

Angie's Aspirations is all about persevering in spite of adversity. Last week we learned about life detoured Kimberly Rae's life. Today we'll hear how those detours led her straight into God's plan.  ~ Angie

And I wrote about learning that worth does not come from what we do for the Lord, but from who we are in the Lord, and His value of us is based on the extent of His love, not the extent of our abilities or achievements.

All of this I know. And I know about Asia, about the street kids in my book, about the missionaries who have their own faults and inconsistencies, about the color and life and noise and all the things that make up a foreign culture.

I'm certain that my years in missions were not for the sole purpose of being able to write a good book, but I see that being able to write from memory, from real experiences and thoughts and feelings, creates a much more powerful essence than I could have created from research.

So all that to say, those nebulous "they" people were right. Writing about what you know is more powerful. God is going to use what I know as the way for me to remain involved in missions. Despite not being able to go out there myself anymore, I get to verbally take readers there, introduce them to missions, to another culture, and to the needs of the world they live in. Then I get to ask them to get involved in helping rescue women and children around the world.

Who knows? Maybe some young woman will read my book, and God will use it to call her to overseas work. Maybe my book will result in women being rescued that I myself could never have reached. It's just a glimpse, but that would be a good answer to the question of why God sent me there, then brought me back. I know it's not the whole answer, but it is enough of an answer to remind me to trust Him with the rest of the question.

And He alone knows what He plans for the future, so I might as well stop trying to figure it all out and just let Him be in charge. He does so much of a better job at it than I do, anyway.

So I shall continue to write what I know, and let God use it however He will.

What about you? Have you ever been able to use your hardships to minister to others? 

About the Author

Kimberly Rae has lived in Bangladesh, Uganda, Kosovo and Indonesia. Her novels on international human trafficking (Stolen Woman, Stolen Child, Stolen Future) are all Amazon bestsellers! Rae has been published over 250 times and has work in 6 languages. Find out more at www.kimberlyrae.com or read Kimberly's real-life adventures on her blog,www.kimberlyraeauthor.blogspot.com!

Stolen Woman, Stolen Child and Stolen Future
by Kimberly Rae

Read excerpts of Rae's Stolen books at www.stolenwoman.org.

Why Would God Shelve Me? Our Difficulties Make Us Better Writers, Part 1 by Kimberly Rae

Kimberly Rae

Angie's Aspirations is all about persevering in spite of adversity. We all have problems, reasons to keep us from writing. Most of the time we consider them to be nuisances, but did you ever think of them as gifts? For the next two Tuesdays, Kimberly Rae tells us why God sometimes puts us back on the shelf. ~ Angie

Sometimes I have wondered why God sent me overseas for so many years, then brought me back. I spent so much time studying and adapting to different cultures, I learned a new language, I was ready to give my life to overseas missions.

Then my health problems brought my whole family back to America. As far as we can tell, back to stay. 

I would be lying to say I haven't wondered why. So many people are not willing to go. We were willing, so why keep us here?

God does work in mysterious ways, and some questions will never get answers until heaven (and by then likely they won't matter anymore anyway!). Then again, sometimes God lets us see glimpses of the answers here in this life.

I think my glimpse has come in the form of a book--my book on human trafficking titled Stolen Woman. The setting is Kolkata, a place I've visited twice, next to Bangladesh, where I lived for 2 years. Writing it was like going back for a visit. And the main character's experiences--being young, idealistic and desperately wanting to do something of significance--all of that was written more from memory than imagination.

They (whoever they are) say you should write about what you know. I did. I wrote about a girl who appears competent and confident but is really insecure, and wants to make a difference to show herself and God that she is worthwhile. I wrote about arriving into a world that has too much evil, too many orphans, too many trapped women, and the painful realization that she cannot save the world, no matter how much she cares.

For more about what Kimberly wrote, check back with us next Tuesday. How about you? Has life ever thrown you a curve ball?

About the Author

Kimberly Rae has lived in Bangladesh, Uganda, Kosovo and Indonesia. Her novels on international human trafficking (Stolen Woman, Stolen Child, Stolen Future) are all Amazon bestsellers! Rae has been published over 250 times and has work in 6 languages. Find out more at www.kimberlyrae.com or read Kimberly's real-life adventures on her blog,www.kimberlyraeauthor.blogspot.com!

Stolen Woman, Stolen Child and Stolen Future
by Kimberly Rae

Read excerpts of Rae's Stolen books at www.stolenwoman.org.