Deep POV: Getting in Character and Staying There by Kelly Irvin

Readers have told me that by the time they finish reading my novels, they feel as if they are part of the heroine’s family. Readers have written asking if the baby was a boy or a girl—as if he was born after the story ended. How does a writer do that? Take readers so deeply into a character’s life and keep them there so that they feel they’ve lived the story?

It’s craft, storytelling, setting, but it’s also something called deep POV (point of view). It’s not an easy technique to master, for beginning fiction writers or writers who’ve published numerous novels. I still have to work at it with every manuscript. How do I do it? Here are some tips for getting in character and staying there:

1. First eliminate filter words that separate a character from the reader. Put the reader in the character’s POV and leave her there. That means seek out and destroy these words: she said, she wandered, she decided, saw, heard, smelled, hoped, realized, watched, touched, felt, knew, remembered, decided, noticed. All telling words that keep the author on the page.
2. People don’t think: I thought, I realized, I saw. If you’re in deep POV, your character shouldn’t either. Let your character just do it without the signpost words. Show, don’t tell. What does the experience remind the character of? What memories are triggered by the scene’s event?
3. Eliminate emotion words such as anger, fear, anxiety. Again, show, don’t tell. “Fear ran through her,” becomes: “Jennie’s mouth went dry. Her stomach heaved. The hot dog didn’t want to stay down. Purple spots dotted her vision.”
4. Be careful with outward physical descriptions of the POV character. She can’t see her own face. “The man leered. Jennie’s face went red,” becomes “The man leered. Heat like a third-degree burn seared Jennie’s face.”
5. Word choice always reflects the character’s education and experiences. Their station in life. Dialogue should fit the character. How they talk. Internal monologue or how they think should also be expressed in words they would use. You have to know your character well and become her while writing.
6. Don’t use too many words or take time to describe something out of the ordinary. Only describe things your character would notice in the exact way the character will notice. In other words, write third person as if you’re writing first person. You can only see, hear, smell, taste, and feel what the POV character does. React with the emotions the character would have. Not your own. The emotional reaction can only come from the character. That is true of everything in the scene. Stay in character when talking about the other characters, setting, and object descriptions.

Remember these are tips, not rules. Write in your voice. And make your own decisions about when telling will move the story along and showing bogs it down. Follow your own instincts. Remember, it’s your story.

What has been the hardest aspect for you to grasp when it comes to deep POV?

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Two-time ACFW Carol Award finalist Kelly Irvin is the author of the critically acclaimed Amish of Bee County, Bliss Creek Amish, and New Hope Amish series. Her newest release is Beneath the Summer Sun, the second novel in the four-book series Every Amish Season from Zondervan Publishing. Her work has also appeared in four Amish anthologies, An Amish Market, An Amish Summer, An Amish Christmas Love, and An Amish Christmas. Kelly is a retired newspaper reporter and public relations professional who lives with her husband in Texas. They have two children, two grandchildren, and two ornery cats.

A Crash Course in POV: Part Two by Annette M. Irby

Camera lens and focus*

Last month, we began our series on POV (point of view). You can read that post here. Welcome to part two. As promised, I’ve included several definitions to help us navigate POV as we write. 

Every scene requires a POVC (point-of-view character). At the beginning of each scene, ground us in the POVC’s perspective so we can: 1) view the setting; 2) feel the POVC’s feelings; 3) care to keep reading; and 4) not have characters materializing on the page.

From that chosen POVC, describe the setting as the scene opens. If certain other characters are present, and our POVC knows it, show us. One of the mistakes I often see is characters materializing suddenly because the author didn’t show us who was present. Readers might think: where did he come from?

To help ground readers in one character’s perspective, you’ll first need to decide which character to choose for the scene you’re writing. To do this, ask: which character has the most to lose? Choose that character as your POVC and then leverage that emotion/angst/tension for a satisfying reading experience.

Now, here are some definitions:

Omniscient POV: Describing a scene from a third-party’s perspective. This is when writers do not choose a main character through which to give us the narrative. Like we discussed last month, omniscient POV was once commonplace. Currently the trend is purist POV (see definition below). One of the biggest problems with omniscient POV, besides the fact that this technique isn’t what today’s readers expect from new fiction, is that it reads like author intrusion. Oftentimes, it comes across as sounding opinionated, and/or it reads like non-fiction (in a fiction manuscript). Most readers are turned off by author intrusion and/or reader feeding. Omniscient POV also distances readers from the MCs’ (main characters’) experience and emotions, which will mean having a less satisfying fiction reading experience.

Purist POV: Remaining in one character’s perspective for an entire scene or chapter. Only give what the point-of-view character would experience with his/her five senses, and how that person interprets what’s happening around him/her.

Head hopping: This is when a writer switches between POVCs within a single scene or chapter, without using a scene break symbol. Once you commit to your scene’s POVC, stay in that person’s head.

Collective POV: This is my own term, and I use it to refer to sharing more than one characters’ experiences at one time, like: they all felt better once the lights came back on. This writer has told us how everyone feels, rather than staying in one character’s POV. A better way to say this would be to say: Everyone sighed with relief, OR everyone seemed to feel better…

Multiple POV: This is when a book is written through several POVCs’ experiences, like an ensemble cast. This is fine, so long as each chapter or scene is written in one POVC’s perspective.  

One more tip: your POVC’s gender influences how they tell their parts of the story. Let their dialogue and inner monologue be in their gender’s voice.

Are there exceptions to these guidelines? Sure. Each genre has its own “rules.” Just know, when an agent or acquisitions editor sits down with your manuscript, they’ll be looking for the basics in your writing technique, including POV.

Your turn: Do you have any questions about POV? Have you learned a few tricks that help you stay aware of who your POVC is for a given scene or chapter? Share your thoughts in the comments. 

Her Nerdy Cowboy

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Her Nerdy Cowboy

Whoever heard of a bookish cowboy? When Logan McDaniel’s brother-in-law dies, he steps in to help his beloved sister run her ranch. But what does a city boy know of herding cattle? Claire Langley loved her cousin. After he dies, she agrees to serve as a temporary nanny for two heartbroken children. 

Claire and Logan find they share a love of books, and Claire can’t resist the nerdy uncle who is great with children, and who reads to her of pirate romance. Claire’s ailing mother needs her in Seattle. Can she break away? And if she does, can there ever be a future for Logan and her?

~~~~~ 

Annette M. Irby

Annette M. Irby has three published books and 

runs her own freelance editing business, AMI Editing. 

See her page here on Seriously Write for more information.

Photo credit: the awesome people at Pixabay.

A Crash Course in POV: Part One by Annette M. Irby

camera lens with water view*

Hey everyone, Annette here. Today I'm beginning a series on point of view that will continue the first Monday of next month as well. Read on!

One of the biggest issues I see as I’m editing for others is the technique of POV (point of view). There are many reasons for this. Like with many writing rules, trends influence what readers/editors want to see in regards to perspective. I imagine you could name a classic or twelve that uses omniscient POV—a current no-no in fiction for most genres. (More on the definition of omniscient POV later in this series.) As writers, we are influenced by what we read. (If you wonder about this, consider the use of the word “roil” in 97 percent of manuscripts. Show me a few books where that word isn’t included.) If the published books we read contain omniscient POV as narration, we feel that is the “correct” way to write. Unfortunately, that’s not currently the expectation of readers or editors (or agents, who track trends like editors do). 

Very basically, "point of view" is the perspective from which we view the action of a scene.  Many have said to think of POV as what a camera experiences from within that person's head. The five senses as experienced from that person's perspective.

The current preference in fiction? Deep point of view (deep POV). Raise your hand if your editor or crit partner has ever said “I can’t feel this emotion here.” There’s a relatable reason writers avoid deep POV: the process exacts a lot from the writer. Authors have to put themselves in the character’s mind/heart and feel everything that character would feel so that s/he can represent that emotion on the page. Who’ll be the first to sign up for that uncomfortable delve into the human psyche? Yet none of us are exempt. 

Writing mentors will tell you that your goal is to provide a satisfying emotional experience through your fiction. Deep POV provides that.

Let’s define various types of point of view:

Deep POV: Where the author expresses the emotions, view, layers, and experience of the POVC (point-of-view character). This involves diving deeply and showing what that specific character is experiencing as they would. Only what the POVC is feeling, seeing, smelling, hearing, tasting can be included here. One common mistake I see with lack of deep POV is the author telling us what the outer expression of the POVC is. Since we’re reading and not watching a movie, please give us the internal visceral reaction the POVC is having and express that. Sure, she can scowl, but rather than only give us that, give us what she’s experiencing internally. Focus on the internal experience, not the outward appearance. 

Deep POV accomplishes many goals readers and editors want to see:

• Deep POV lets readers relate with the POVCs, even the villains.
• Deep POV lets characters feel what the POVC feels.
• Deep POV lets readers live vicariously through their favorite characters. 
• Deep POV helps readers sympathize with the characters so they care enough to want to know how things turn out. 
• Deep POV hooks readers b/c of all of the above and keeps them reading and hopefully telling others how much they loved your book and why they should buy their own copy. (Word of mouth is the golden ticket in marketing.)

A fantastic resource regarding deep POV is Rivet Your Reader with Deep Point of View by Jill Elizabeth Nelson. I recommend this resource both to my clients and to contestants.

Next month we’ll continue this series, including an explanation of omniscient POV and other POV-related terms. In the meantime, it’s your turn. Do you have any questions on POV? Have you received feedback that helped you, or perhaps confused you? Leave your question/comment below, and we’ll discuss it. There’s a lot to POV, but you can master it and readers will thank you for it. 

Her Nerdy Cowboy

~~~~~ 

Her Nerdy Cowboy

Whoever heard of a bookish cowboy? When Logan McDaniel’s brother-in-law dies, he steps in to help his beloved sister run her ranch. But what does a city boy know of herding cattle? Claire Langley loved her cousin. After he dies, she agrees to serve as a temporary nanny for two heartbroken children. 

Claire and Logan find they share a love of books, and Claire can’t resist the nerdy uncle who is great with children, and who reads to her of pirate romance. Claire’s ailing mother needs her in Seattle. Can she break away? And if she does, can there ever be a future for Logan and her?

~~~~~ 

Annette M. Irby

Annette M. Irby has three published books and 

runs her own freelance editing business, AMI Editing. 

See her page here on Seriously Write for more information.

~~~~~ 

Photo credit: the awesome people at Pixabay.

Showing with Deep POV by Maria Michaels

Maria Michaels

Dora here, waving from the RWA national conference in San Antonio! For our readers who plan to attend ACFW, I'll be sharing a little about my conference experience next Thursday. Today, please help me welcome Maria Michaels, who is discussing a character's point of view. Welcome, Maria!

Thank you, Dora, for inviting me here today. I’m so honored to be among such accomplished authors. It made it all a bit intimidating as I tried to think of a post on writing advice! So I decided to approach this from the perspective of a voracious reader first, and a writer second.

I’ve been writing for more than ten years, but if you had asked me about “deep POV” (point of view) when I started out, I’d have given you a blank stare. I might have said that I didn’t know anything about that branch of the government (don’t they all have initials? FBI, CIA, ATF).

As a reader, I prefer certain authors to others but never understood why. Many readers are like me and can’t necessarily pinpoint what draws them into a story, but I’d be willing to bet that nine times out of ten it’s because the author has mastered the art of deep POV.

Deep POV puts us in the character’s head, so we can experience everything exactly as the protagonist does. It removes the distance between the reader and the protagonist. When you get right down to it, deep POV is the best kind of showing.

For instance, if you change the point of view of the protagonist from “her mother would arrive tomorrow” to “Mom would arrive tomorrow” you have closed some distance.

Don’t forget that deep POV also involves giving each of your characters a unique “voice”. We’re not going to hear the same thoughts expressed from an 80-year-old grandfather that we do from a 25 year old woman. Make sure their POV is unique and distinctive and shows who they are at their core.

I’d love you to share some examples of how you were able to deepen POV.

****

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Vera Carrington loves her newly renovated home and her cafe, The Bean, but with a balloon mortgage looming over head and a man from her past ready to bounce on her misfortune, she may have to face the agonizing decision of keeping one and selling the other.

Deputy Sheriff, Ryan Colton, is a new man in Christ. His days as a flamboyant pro-circuit skier are behind him, but to help Vera keep her home and her business, he agrees to coach her for an upcoming open ski tournament. He even agrees to hand over the purse if he should win.

Can Vera beat the odds and win the tournament? Will Ryan save the day, or will they both learn to trust God, no matter the outcome?

Meet Maria: When early onset stage fright dashed dreams of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame status, Maria Michaels tackled her first book in 2010, and now the people and voices that occupy her head refuse to leave.

She no longer sings unless you count randomly bursting into song to annoy her children (and the dogs).

Maria lives in northern California with her family, including two beagles, one who can say ‘hello’ and the other who can feel a pea through several pillows.

Burying Old Bones with Deep POV by Tanya Stowe

Tanya Stowe

Hey, writers! Are you old enough to remember being taught to use two spaces after punctuation? Or to use plenty of detailed description? (Oh, the adjectives.) Writing trends and expectations keep changing. Even now, the phrases "she thought" or "he wondered" are being phased out as editors prefer deep POV. Today's guest, Tanya Stowe, offers some insightful tidbits on deep POV. Read on! ~ Annette

Burying Old Bones with Deep POV

by Tanya Stowe

I’m a dinosaur. I thought when I reached fifty that I’d arrived at the status of a collectible, but now I know I go much further back.

I started writing when the classic form was still popular. Narrative methods were used—maybe overused—and author insertion worked. As a dutiful student, I learned to think and write as an author “observer.” Even though I was considered a bit of a groundbreaker with my scenes starting in the middle of action and dialogue, I still found myself garnering comments like “too passive, be more active” or the dreaded “show don’t tell.”

With the onset of e-Publishing, readers have an expectation of faster reads with even more immediacy. As an e-Published author, I knew it was time to shed those old “dino” bones and raise my writing to a new level. But where to start?

I belong to a writers’ organization that does a very good job of educating its up and coming writers. At many conferences and online classes I’d attended workshops about deep point of view. Old-timer and experienced writer that I am, I naturally assumed deep POV meant getting deep into the psyche of your characters.

And that, dear friends, is why my old bones were rattling!

I jumped into some serious research on deep POV and found that it’s definitely about delving into your character, but it’s much more. The technique tells the story from the protagonist’s stream of consciousness, revealing events from inside, through the character’s thoughts and actions.

With deep POV, the character unfolds different personality traits through quirky thoughts, repetitive actions or intense internal reactions with opposing external actions. Imagine the explosion going on inside James Bond as he delivers one of his one-line comebacks to the bad guys! Or maybe Mr. Bond really is just as calm on the inside as the outside. With the use of deep POV, the possibilities for rich, multi-dimensional characters are endless.

Deep POV is great for characterization but it also makes the story more immediate by eliminating the insertion of the author’s thoughts and presence in the middle of the story. No outside narrator exists between the reader and the protagonist. The reader lives the story as if she is the protagonist.

But be careful. Deep POV is not a continuous stream of conscious monologue. That can be as boring and off-putting as author intrusion. An occasional word or phrase in italics accentuates deep POV and brings depth, insight, or emotion to a scene.  It doesn’t eliminate the need for good descriptions or snappy dialogue but deep POV will eliminate almost all of those pesky “show-don’t-tell” pop-ups that can plague even the best of writers.

Personally, I’m counting on deep POV to bury some bones so deep they never come back to the surface.

Tender Trust

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Tender Trust

Alex Marsden dragged Penny Layton out of the gutter and promised her a happily-ever-after love with a house and a white-picket fence. But the Civil War changed their paths. Separated twice by circumstances beyond their control, Penny learned to survive on her own, but lost hope. Five years later when Alex miraculously returns to her, Penny doesn't believe in happy endings or miracles. Will Alex's faith and love be strong enough to drag Penny out of the gutter one more time?

~~~~~

Tanya Stowe is an author of Christian fiction with an unexpected edge. She fills her stories with the unusual…gifts of the spirit and miracles, mysteries and exotic travel, even an angel or two. No matter where Tanya takes you…on a journey to the Old West or to contemporary adventures in foreign lands…be prepared for the extraordinary. Connect with Tayna here: 

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