8 Tips to Help Balance Mothering and Writing by Denise Weimer

Are you one of those people who needs uninterrupted quiet to put words on a page? *Hand waving.* I confess. I am.

During my “stay home mom” days when my daughters toddled from one creative mess to another, writing time proved discouragingly elusive. Although the girls are now high school and college age, I still write and edit from home—from my kitchen island, of all places—and to my surprise, young adult schedules can be just as interruptive as toddler schedules. And I still struggle to find blocks of time when they’re gone and my husband is working. Honestly, it’s as though my house has a revolving door. But … I now serve as a managing editor and have been blessed to see more than a dozen titles traditionally published.

So how do young moms make progress along that rocky road to publication? I found a few particular tips helpful back in the day.

1. Be willing to take a hiatus. This is probably not the first tip you want to hear. My drive to write was so intense when I was in my twenties that God literally had to take it away for a season. And I had to surrender to that season. Listen carefully. Is He knocking on your heart?

2. Nap time. After the hiatus, a novella took shape as my two-year-old snoozed. I started with a small, manageable project set locally for ease of research and promotion … but Redeeming Grace became the stepping stone for my next series.

3. Mother’s Morning Out. Many churches or organizations will offer you an escape. Other moms may use it for shopping or socializing. You may need solitary confinement.

4. Relatives or a babysitter. Don’t let the misperception that your writing is not “real work” stop you from asking for a day a week to concentrate. It will only become “real work” if you give yourself permission to have a “real job” and the confidence that God gave you a talent worth using.

5. Join a writers’ group and/or attend a writers’ conference. A great way to educate yourself and stay connected with like-minded individuals while your work is in progress.

6. Task prioritizing. The most excellent advice I ever read as a young mom/writer was to save housework and chores for times the kids are around, and write when they aren’t. Use the everyday tasks for chatting and teaching, but give yourself the gift of writing while they’re in school or elsewhere.

7. Foster appreciation for your work. Let your kids into your work world by reading age-appropriate snippets of your writing to them, giving talks at their schools, and having elementary school-age and older children accompany you to book signings. Kids can be great helpers handing out business cards and bookmarks! What an icebreaker.

8. Let the law of demand guide your schedule. Put writing and book events secondary to family events. As long as you’re usually “just mom” to your kids, they’ll appreciate the days you need to morph into “mom the writer.”

What guidelines do you find helpful in balancing mothering and writing? 

Tips to help young moms "progress along that rocky road to publication". via @denise_weimer #SeriouslyWrite #amwriting

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Denise Weimer writes historical and contemporary romance and romantic suspense set in her home state of Georgia. She’s authored over ten published novels—including her March releases, Spring Splash (https://www.amazon.com/Spring-Splash-Denise-Weimer-ebook/dp/B0845LXMHP/) and Traces (https://www.amazon.com/Traces-Denise-Weimer-ebook/dp/B0845SJZCQ/)—and a number of novellas. As a managing editor for the historical imprints of Lighthouse Publishing of the Carolinas, she also helps others reach their publishing dreams. 

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Can Life Get Any Crazier? by Lacy Williams

Lacy Williams

My family welcomed a new addition this year: our youngest daughter was born in March. My husband and I also have an almost-four-year-old girl and a two-year-old boy.

My mom thinks I am a little nuts to try to balance a writing career with the little ones at home, but I don't see it much differently than having a part-time job outside the home. And there are some days that my characters and writing is the only thing keeping me sane.

I'd love to share some tips on how I get things done. These may not work for everyone, but they do work for me.

1) When I do get writing time, either after bedtime or when I have a babysitter, my focus is all on writing. No email. No social media. No goofing off.

2) I try to keep realistic deadlines. This has been a learning process for me working with my publisher. For some reason, my kids always seem to get sick the week before my deadline is up. So I've learned to plan for a few extra weeks for each deadline within the contract. I've also learned to work ahead, and not procrastinate until the last minute--unless I want to be up all night finishing the book (which I've had to do a couple of times).

3) Count on others. This has been a big one for me. I'm an independent person who doesn't like to lean on others much, but I've had to ask for help from family to watch the kids or let my husband know when it was his time to put the kids in bed.

4) Enjoy the small moments. It's a constant balancing act to remember that my needs and goals aren't the only ones that matter. I want to spend time with my kiddos now while they're small, and not miss those little moments like when my son blew his first bubbles or the littlest one learning to roll over for the first time. The first laugh. First ballet class. I think a lot of parents share this same struggle, because on one hand we have to put food on the table, but we all need to learn to slow down and enjoy the small moments.

For our family this year, that meant taking a family vacation (we invited my parents and sister since we were outnumbered by kids!). What a fun time to slow down, spend time together and do things we haven't done in awhile. We visited a theme park and hubby and I got to sneak away to ride a big roller coaster--something I haven't done since before the kids came, but it was like having a few moments of my own childhood back to go on the exhilerating ride.

I'm certainly not perfect at balancing my priorities, but it is something I've been working on!

Dora here. What about you? 

Do you struggle with balancing writing and family life?

Maybe a full-time job, too?

How do you balance everything?

Roping the Wrangler
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Teacher Seeks a Husband
Schoolmarm Sarah Hansen longs for a family of her own. But horse trainer Oscar White is the last man she'd consider. Still, she can't help noticing the care he shows three motherless girls and the gentle way he helps Sarah overcome her fear of horses.

Too bossy by half—that's the Sarah that Oscar remembers from their teenage years. Yet as a former orphan, he finds the little Caldwell sisters—and their pretty teacher—getting under his skin. Could the tender heart Sarah's always hidden tame a once-reckless wrangler?

Meet Lacy: By day, Lacy Williams is a stay-at-home mom battling dirty diapers and dog-hair dust-bunnies. By night, she is an award-winning novelist. She loves dogs, chocolate ice cream, romantic movies and her number-crunching husband. Her most recent book, ROPING THE WRANGLER, comes out in August from Love Inspired Historical. http://www.lacywilliams.net

How to Balance Motherhood and Writing by Penny Zeller

We may dream of living in a cabin in the mountains, a cottage on the beach, or a penthouse apartment in New York with no responsibilities except to write. But that’s what it is—a dream. We all fight to balance our time while trying to take care of our families, day jobs, and volunteer responsibilities. This Fortifying Friday, author Penny Zeller is here to encourage and offer tips to moms who also happen to be writers! Enjoy! 

~ Dawn

How to Balance Motherhood and Writing

By Penny Zeller

When I decided to write a post about balancing writing life with family life, I had to give that topic some heavy-duty thought. After all, I’m still working on figuring out how to prioritize and fit in all the duties of being a wife, mom, and author, especially since there is no such thing as a typical day. J

So, how do you balance the demands of motherhood with the demands of writing? I’ve narrowed it down to five steps that I have found helpful –

1. Pray. Each morning before I climb out of bed and face a day of mothering, chauffeuring kids to after-school events, housecleaning, volunteering, and writing books, I ask the Lord to prepare my heart. I ask that He guide my day, that I would use my time wisely, and that I would get accomplished only what He would have me do that day.

2. Get your priorities straight. Children grow up so fast and I don’t want to regret the time I spent on things that weren’t important. What is really important are those eternal differences we make in the lives of others, particularly our family members. My husband and my children are my main ministry, and I have to remember who comes first (after the Lord) in this life of busyness. But then, how do I make time for my career?

3. Be deliberate. I have to be deliberate about putting aside time for my writing. I work while my children are in school and then quit for the day when they come home.

4. Don’t get sidetracked. So many things to do on the computer and so little time! Emailing, Facebooking, tweeting, blogging, Linking in—who has time for it all? And I can get sidetracked at the drop of a hat! I have to keep my focus or I’ll look back on the day and realize nothing of consequence was accomplished. I have found that making a list of things I need to do for the day in order of importance is helpful.

5. Make a poster. I taped a homemade “office hours” paper to my office door and try hard to adhere to those writing hours when my children are in school. I have posted these writing hours, not so much for visitors, but for myself. It reminds me that if I don’t set aside time for my writing, it will be spent doing a host of other “unnecessary” things (see point #4).

So, there you have it. And now, I must tend to those dirty dishes in the sink. Ah, balancing writing life and chores. Now that’s a topic for another time!

Penny Zeller is the author of several books and numerous magazine articles in national and regional publications. She is also the author of the humor blog "A Day in the Life of a Wife, Mom, and Author" (www.pennyzeller.wordpress.com). She is an active volunteer in her community, serving as a women's Bible study small-group leader and co-organizing a women's prayer group. Penny devotes her time to assisting and nurturing women and children into a closer relationship with Christ. Her passion is to use the gift of the written word that God has given her to glorify Him and to benefit His kingdom. Hailee is the final book in the series, which began with McKenzie and Kaydie in Montana Skies, her first series with Whitaker House. When she's not writing, Penny enjoys spending time with her family and camping, hiking, canoeing, and playing volleyball. She and her husband reside in Wyoming with their two children. Penny loves to hear from her readers at her website, www.pennyzeller.com and on Facebook at www.facebook.com/pennyzellerbooks

Where readers can find me on the web:

www.pennyzeller.com (website)

www.pennyzeller.wordpress.com (blog)

www.facebook.com/pennyzellerbooks (Facebook)

http://twitter.com/pennyzeller (Twitter)

Book Trailer for Hailee: http://youtu.be/LEGoM43jtwA