How do you keep writing when your family is in
crisis? Where do you find the time to sit down and focus your thoughts enough
to actually put words on paper? How can you possibly meet deadlines when you
never know what the next moment will bring? It is a challenge I have been
wrestling with for over five years and it isn’t easy. Below are some things
I’ve learned, which I hope will encourage you, when you face a storm in your
life.
1 – Be realistic
If you realize you're not going to be able to
meet a deadline, the time to speak up and ask for an extension is well before
the due date. Don't wait till the day before to say something. Publishers can
often adjust scheduling, but it will be much easier for them if they have
plenty of advance notice. The challenge for me is that I always underestimate
how long something will take. It requires taking a very critical look at
exactly what I can and cannot do in the allotted time frame. Admitting I need
more time is very hard, but is sometimes necessary.
2 - Keep your mind in your story
I had heard about people who wrote books at
the sickbed of a loved one, but I will admit I was skeptical. How on earth
could you possibly write at a time like that? But I found out it is possible.
Maybe not writing long passages, but as I sat by Dad’s beside in the early
morning hours, I pulled out my yellow legal pad and jotted plot ideas and
character sketches and other things that kept the story at the forefront of my
mind.
3 - Take opportunities where you find them
There were a couple of days at the end of
Dad’s battle, while Mom and I took turns at the hospital, that I was able to
come home and realize I had a few scant hours to get some words on the page.
I'm the kind of person who needs a deadline to accomplish anything, so this
worked in my favor. Since I'd been thinking about the story, I knew what I
wanted to write, so I was able to make the most of those little snatches here
and there and make some progress. Getting up crazy-early in the morning also
worked some days.
4 – Take care of yourself
No one person can do everything, which is
something I have a hard time admitting. But it’s absolutely true. Give yourself
permission to take a nap, turn the ringer down on your phone, and draw some
boundaries around your availability. I was surprised to discover that allowing
myself to think about my story was actually a great mental break. Give yourself
lots of grace. And when people offer to help, don’t brush their offers aside.
Take them up on it.
5- Keep your perspective
Eccelsiates 3:1 tells us that, “For everything there is a season, and a
time for every [a]purpose
under heaven.” For me, the hardest thing about this season was knowing Dad’s
“happy ending” would be when he crossed onto heaven’s shore, which he did on
July 17, 2018. But after a valiant three-week battle, and the struggle with
Alzheimer’s for years before that, we can’t wish him back. Though we will miss
him like crazy, he is whole and healthy today, and better than he’s ever been.
And we had the privilege of walking him home.
Life is an ever-changing mix of
seasons, and staying afloat is a lot like piloting a boat. It requires skill
and agility and a trust in the one who made the waves.
I
will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.” (Psalm 91:2)
my God, in whom I trust.” (Psalm 91:2)
When the storms hit, do what you can and let
the rest go. Stand on God’s promises, enlist help, and do what you need to
do—for your writing and for your family. Know I will be cheering you on.
Bio: Connie Mann is an author and a
USCG-licensed boat captain. During this stormy season of her family’s life, she
wrote the 3-book Safe Harbor series (Waterfall) and has written the first novel
and a novella for her upcoming series with Sourcebooks. She is hard at work on
the second book in the series. She also pilots a boat for her local school system,
so when she’s not writing, she takes local school children out on the Silver
River, showing many of them their very first alligator. You can find Connie
online at: www.conniemann.com.
DEADLY MELODY (Safe Harbor #3)
Home is where the heart is. The danger, too . . .
The
Martinellis were the closest thing to family Cat Johnson ever had. That’s why
she ran—to protect them from her threatening past. The orphaned child of
classical musicians, she’s been lying low in Nashville, and performing at the
No Name Café. When Cat reluctantly agrees to attend the wedding of her beloved
foster sister, the plan is simple: make a quick appearance at the Martinellis
and then disappear again. Instead she’s thrust headlong into a nightmare.
After
a wedding guest is murdered, Cat’s past descends with a vengeance. So does
handsome and inquisitive Safe Harbor cop, Nick Stanton, who will stop at
nothing to uncover the town’s secrets. That means exposing Cat’s as well. The more
intimate Nick’s feelings for Cat become, the more driven he is to find out what
she’s hiding.
As
things in Safe Harbor take a terrifying turn, Cat realizes that the man she’s
afraid to trust might be the only one she can turn to.
