Layer the Finishing Details: Sensory Details
Build it Right series
by Dora Hiers
How sweet are your words to my taste,
sweeter than honey
to my mouth!
(Psalm 119:103 NIV)
The mason lathers mortar on the last brick and slaps it
in place. Your eyes widen. Your heart beats a frantic rhythm. A
smile lights up your face. “Wow! Hello house!”
You’re excited because you know the end is near. But the
house isn’t done yet. Other things need to happen on the inside before you can
move in. Final tasks like painting, installing cabinets and appliances.
The same goes for our writing. We’ve cemented our
foundation and joined cohesive elements, but for our story to light up our readers,
we must add some finishing touches.
Layer sensory details.
Think back to the last time you received new prescription
lenses. How much clearer, more sharp or vivid, was your vision after putting on
the new lenses? Sprinkling sensory details makes our writing crisp, brings it
into focus, and makes the story literally dance off the page.
Let’s have some fun.
How many sensory details can you find in this excerpt from
Journey’s Edge?
Her face plowed into an
expansive, muscular chest. Strong hands grabbed McKinley’s upper arms. A vague,
familiar smell permeated the man’s torso, a citrus and woodsy scent mingled
with masculine deodorant. She heard the door close behind her and felt legs
wimp out on her. Good thing this guy held her up or she would have sank
straight to the floor like a pile of spaghetti. She angled a hand to eject
chest hair from her tongue, trying not to make a face.
“Honey, if you’re looking
for that kind of action, you’ve got the wrong room.”
Now you try it. In one or two paragraphs, write the following
scene with as many sensory details as you can fit in.
After crying herself to
sleep, the next morning Delaney follows the scent of coffee and stumbles into
her tiny kitchen, frightened to find a man making chocolate chip pancakes. She
didn’t know that Sage, a friend she’s secretly been in love with forever, spent
the night on the couch.
Give it a shot. You know you want to try…
Join us next week as we celebrate success, hold a Housewarming
Party, and consider our next project.
~~~~~
Journey's Edge:
A Routine Audit? Hardly. Red flags-including some goon who's following
her-raise McKinley Frasier's suspicions that numbers don't add up at the
insurance firm. When someone tries to snatch McKinley's daughter from
school, she turns to police officer and ex-fiance, Renner Crossman-the
cop who walked out on her a month before their wedding. But Renner's not
the same guy who broke her heart ten years ago. He calls himself a "new
man." She trusts the new Renner with her daughter's safety...but what
about her heart?
(print) (e-book)
~~~~~
After a successful auditing career, Dora Hiers left
the corporate world to be a stay-at-home mom to her two sons. When her youngest
son didn’t want her hanging out at school with him anymore, Dora started
writing heart racing, God-gracing books. Dora belongs to the American Christian
Fiction Writers (ACFW) and the Carolina Christian Writers. Her first
inspirational romance, Journey’s End,
released with White Rose Publishing in 2011, and her second, Journey’s Edge released in March 2012.
White Rose also contracted her third book in the Marshals of Journey Creek
series, Journey’s Embrace, and her
first short romance, Small Town Treasure.
Dora
and her husband make their home in Kannapolis, North Carolina.
Connect with Dora:
Website: www.dorahiers.com
Email: Dora@DoraHiers.com
Facebook:
Dora Hiers Author
Twitter: @DoraHiers
Twitter: @DoraHiers