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| Rondi Bauer Olson |
Most of us probably struggle with our human
imperfections. Author Rondi Bauer Olson shares one of her
experiences, as well as encouragement for those days when we feel unworthy to
be writers spreading the news about God and his love. ~ Dawn
Being
an Imperfect Writer
My phone rang right before my talk at the library was
supposed to begin. I considered not answering, but it was work, and I was on
call for information technologies. I imagined the worst, like the entire
network being down. Instead, a co-worker, who often called about the simplest
things, began a casual conversation. Nothing urgent. Nothing that couldn’t have
waited until I was back at the office. My temperature rose. I let her have it.
Disconnecting, I walked around the bookcase to see the Teen
Writer’s Group staring at me. They had heard every word. I was supposed to be
giving them a talk about incorporating theme in their writing, using my
manuscript and its theme of love and mercy as an example. I felt like such a
hypocrite and failure.
Most writers don’t like the idea of being a public figure.
In general we are an introverted bunch with a love of words, but we do want
people to read what we’ve written, and if we’re fortunate, thousands or even
tens of thousands of people will. Our influence doesn’t stop on the page.
Readers follow us on social media, come to book signings to meet us in person,
and sometimes write personal messages to us. They want to know the person
behind the stories they love, but often we don’t feel so comfortable with
ourselves. Worse, as Christian writers, we have an enemy who likes to remind us
of our flaws, and tells us our shortcomings disqualify us for service. The
characters in our books may have problems, but we’re supposed to be perfect.
If you’ve ever felt unworthy to write or be published, know
you aren’t alone. Many of us look at ourselves and fear instead of glorifying
God with our writing, we’ll bring reproach to his name. This fear, however,
isn’t from our Heavenly Father. It is from our adversary, the accuser who wants
us to give up in shame and discouragement. God’s message to us is quite
different. He tells us his “strength is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor. 12:9
KJV). Not that we are to be proud of our flaws, but personal struggles are part
of the human condition.
Back at the library, I was tempted to pretend nothing had
happened. Instead, I apologized to the group and acknowledged no one deserved
to be treated the way I had just treated my co-worker. I excused myself, and in
private called my co-worker back and apologized. When I did start my talk, I
apologized again, and said that not only was my main character flawed, I was,
too, and always in need of God’s love and mercy. That session could have been
incredibly awkward. Fortunately, the kids gave me a second chance. Still, I
probably learned more that day than they did. Our imperfections can help us
illustrate God’s redemptive love, sometimes even better than the characters in
our stories.
Have
you ever been tempted to give up on writing or publication because of personal
flaws or spiritual failings? What kept you going?
Rondi Bauer Olson
is a reader, writer, and animal wrangler from Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. Her
debut novel for young adults, ALL THINGS NOW LIVING, was a finalist in the 2012
ACFW Genesis Contest and is scheduled for release this spring by Written World
Communications.
You can learn more and connect with Rondi at these online
sites:
Website: http://www.rondiolson.com
Blog for Writers: http://rondiolson.blogspot.com
